Here’s an idea: you already have the life you’ve always wanted. In fact, you’ve always had it. Confusing, I know. Most people don’t distinguish between the life that they actually want and the one they think they want.
See what I mean? Plenty of people think they want to be fit and healthy, but what they actually want is to eat fast food and watch TV, so that’s what they do. Many think they want to be more open-minded, but what they actually want is to be right all the time, so they tune out opposing viewpoints.
Simply put, whatever it is you actually want out of life is whatyou’re actually getting from it. Everyone has dreams, but not everyonepursues them. Without a direct connection between something you wantand something you can do to get it, a dream will always remain justthat - a dream.
So how do we bridge that gap? How can we turn what we think we want into what we actually get? Here are some strategies I use. Maybe a few of them will work for you:
See what I mean? Plenty of people think they want to be fit and healthy, but what they actually want is to eat fast food and watch TV, so that’s what they do. Many think they want to be more open-minded, but what they actually want is to be right all the time, so they tune out opposing viewpoints.
Simply put, whatever it is you actually want out of life is whatyou’re actually getting from it. Everyone has dreams, but not everyonepursues them. Without a direct connection between something you wantand something you can do to get it, a dream will always remain justthat - a dream.
So how do we bridge that gap? How can we turn what we think we want into what we actually get? Here are some strategies I use. Maybe a few of them will work for you:
- Focus on one thing. When I get the idea to make abig change, I usually want to do 100 things all at the same time. Thisnever works. Focus on one thing that will improve your life and don’tmove on until you’ve mastered it.
- Find a daily action. Big changes don’t alwayshappen overnight, but what you do every day between sunrise and sunsetis the most important part of ensuring it actually does happen. What’sone little thing you can do right now without waiting for anything elseto get started? Ask yourself that every’ single’ day.
- Reflect on your changes. Is this bigtransformation you’re after actually making you happier? Best to take asecond every now and again to make sure you’re not perpetuallysuffering from ‘the grass is greener on the other side‘ syndrome. Make sure you’re headed the right direction.
- Change your environment. Sometimes I don’trealize just how much my surroundings affect my behavior. A routineenvironment perpetuates routine behavior. If you want change to come alittle easier, change the scenery for a while and build a new set ofbehaviors to associate with it.
- Rebalance relationships. Just like yourenvironment, the people you’re around influence how you act. Truth is,your friends don’t want you to change even if they say they do becausethat makes them uncomfortable. The first time I decided to bea writer, I hung around with all the same people that didn’t understandme. The second time I decided to be a writer, I started hanging aroundother successful writers. Which one worked?
- Eliminate barriers. Sometimes they’re mental, andsometimes they’re physical. Either way, you have to get creative tofind ways around them. If you don’t have the time to do something, howcan you fit it into little sessions that will add up over time? If youdon’t have the money to do something, what else do you have that youcan trade for what you want?
- Ask for help. We all get stuck. I do regularly. Iused to have too much pride to ask for help ‚’I'd rather figure it outon my own. Now I realize that’s foolish and asking for help is a hellof a lot faster and easier. There’s no shame in being more efficient.
- Find a role model. One of the fastest ways tosuccess is to model it. Who’s already done what you’re trying to do?What things did they do that got them there faster? What slowed themdown? Model what worked, avoid what didn’t.
- Relax already! Active relaxation ‚’doing thingsthat engage you but aren’t your main focus ‚’ can bring a lot ofclarity when you’re obsessing over something. I can brainstorm all day,but it doesn’t mean I’ll come up with a good idea. Those usually creepin when I finally take a break and do something else.
