Growing up in the U.S., as a first generation Chinese-American, was not an easy experience. However, I feel that my unique experiences have given me insightssintosboth cultures that have helped make me a richer person. I grew up in the little town of Union City, New Jersey. This working cLAss area has been settled predominately by immigrants of Latin America and is conveniently located across the Hudson River from New York City. I grew up being one of a small minority of Asian individuals in this area. My family came here to make a living as blue-collar workers owning a Chinese restaurant. Most families in China idealize America as this great "Gold Mountain," a land of opportunityswheresanyone can make their fortune if they work hard enough. One is not constrained by familial ties and societal cLAss, which prevents one from advancing in traditional Asian cultures. My life revolved around this restaurant. My parents worked 12-hour days just to make a comfortable living they could never have attained in China. Both my parents had to make sacrifices to their family and did not receive an education. Unfortunately after 8 years of laborious work and encroaching competition in the area, my parents decided to sell their restaurant and find work in New York City in the hotel industry. In the meantime, my parents heavily reinforced hard work and education so that my siblings and I wouldn't fallsintosthe same pattern of lost opportunity that they had. They also reinforced obeisance and decorum in their children. As a result of their strict upbringing, when I camesintosmy own in my late teens and early 20s, I rebelled against them. I no longer wanted to be a minion following the words of my parents. I wanted to have my own identity. What I didn't realize was that the core of the Chinese family was instilled centuries ago by the tenets of Confucianism, which placed the focus on the family. These traditional concepts went against all my individualistic ideas from my American cLAsses. When I reached college age and was leaving for the first time out of the protective grasp of my parents, I didn't know what to do with myself. All my life, I had my parents tell me what I should do or not to do with my life. They didn't want me to go to college or university but instead to business schoolswheresI could get an associate's degree in 2 years and enter the job force as a secretary. Then I would be able to provide for themsintostheir old age. I decided against this course of action and was blacklisted by them for a while. With time, our relationship grew with understanding. They understand that, as Asian-Americans, we are different and our uniqueness should be celebrated. We have the opportunities they dreamed of for themselves as immigrants to the U.S. |