We spend much of our lives going about completely blind to reality, and yet we still have the gall to act victimized when it invariably catches up to us. – Nenia Campbell 我们完全不顾生活现实白白浪费了很多生命时光,既然避免不了要面对现实生活,那么我们仍要有胆量来面对。——作家奈尼尔-坎贝尔
1. You cannot always rely on friends 你不可能一直靠朋友帮忙 You will need certain life skills when nobody else is around. In this way you can rely on yourself to get out of trouble. It is a sad fact of life that we cannot count on other people most of the time. Make sure you have the following skills: 在你周围没人可以依靠的日子里,那就需要你掌握一定的生活技能,这样你可以靠自己走出困境。大部分时间我们无法指望别人,这个悲哀的生活事实是我们要面对的。你要保证自己掌握以下技能: You can cook 会做饭 You can drive 会开车 You know about the power switches in your home 知道你家里电源开关的位置 You have a spare set of keys in a secret place for when you get locked out 有一套备用钥匙放在隐秘地方以备自己锁在外面时用 You can manage your time 自己把握好时间 You learn something new about information technology every day to become computerate. 每天学习一些新的信息技术丰富自己的电脑知识
2. Make time for your passion 找时间去做自己爱做的事情 Whatever you love doing, make sure you do it at a set time. This is important because you find that friends, family, your boss, and your pet will be constantly yapping at your heels trying to steal your time. You have to build in the following defense mechanisms to stop people making unreasonable demands at the wrong moment: 无论你喜欢做什么,都要保证你在自己设定的时间内做完。这一点很重要,因为你会发现你的朋友、你的家庭、你的老板、跟在你身后朝你叫个不停的宠物都在窃取着你的宝贵时间。你必须建立以下防御机制来阻止人们在错误的时刻做出不合理的要求: Switch off your phone 关掉电话 Turn off the computer 关掉电脑 Go out and do it or lock yourself in 出门去做,或是把自己关在家里 Leave Post-its to remind these intruders. (Yes, I know your pet can't read but the others can!) 记在便利贴上提醒那些干扰你的人(是,我知道你的宠物看不懂但别人能看懂!)
3. You accept challenges 你要接受挑战 In order to grow in being sociable, stronger both physically and mentally, you have to accept challenges on a regular basis. You are pushing yourself to get better and stronger. 为了增强社交能力,身心都要锻炼得更加坚强,你要定期接受挑战。你把自己变得更优秀更坚强。
4. You like being alone but you are not a loner 你喜欢独自一人,但你不是一个孤独的人 If you're lonely when you're alone, you're in bad company. – Jean-Paul Sartre 如果你独自一人时感到孤独,就说明你没有把自己陪好。——约翰-保罗萨特 It is impossible to exist without social contact. You can be as strong and self-sufficient as you like, but at the end of the day you need to interact in a real, personal and meaningful way, which is neither Facebook nor Twitter. You need to be in contact with real people for this. 不可能不与社会接触。你可以让自己变得像你想象的那样坚强和自信,结束一天的工作,但在工作之余你需要与现实生活中的个人进行这有意义的互动,不要生活在脸书和推特的虚拟世界中。你要与真实的人接触交流。 At the same time, you can enjoy quiet time alone and you are comfortable with that. The health benefits range from increased creativity, less depression and improved memory. 同时,你可以享受安静的独处时光,会让你很舒服。对健康也有增加创造力、减少抑郁、改善记忆的益处。
5. Lower your expectations 降低你的期望值 I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations and you're not in this world to live up to mine. – Bruce Lee 我活着不是为了满足你的期望,就像你也不是因为我的期望而活着一样。——李小龙 Don't think that people will always be there when you fall or fail. The phone will go silent. Many friends will suddenly be very busy with their own problems. 在你人生不得意或失意之时,不要认为总有人会围着你转。你的电话不再响起,你曾经的很多朋友很突然地都在各忙各的。
6. Prepare for bad times 为不得意的日子做好准备 Stuff happens and it can get nasty! You will have to learn to be stronger and not give up. But the good news is that adversity and suffering will make you appreciate life afterwards. Those who endured hardships, like being homeless, divorced or ill, found that they been able to develop better coping strategies and were more socially active. 不得意的人生遭遇的确令人不悦,你要学会坚强不放弃。但好在遭遇逆境和磨难之后,会让你对生活满怀感激之情。像无家可归的人、离婚的人或生病的人,这些历经艰难困苦的人能够找出更好的应对策略并积极参与社交活动。 Hope for the best and cope with the rest. – Anon 满怀最美好的希望,谋事在人成事在天。 ——无名氏
7. You cannot be popular with everybody 你无法取悦每个人 It's just chemistry. There are people who will rub you up the wrong way, will be bitchy, and will be downright unhelpful in the workplace. You can adopt a few avoidance strategies to reduce the fallout. Get over it and enjoy the company of the real friends you have. 只不过是个化学反应而已。在职场上有些人会惹恼你,有些人会让你抓狂,有些人对你丝毫起不到帮助作用。你可以采取一些规避策略以减少对你的影响。克服那些不利影响享受你的好朋友陪伴着你的美好时光。
8. You learn from failure 你要从失败中学习经验教训 Everybody screws up. You know that perfection is impossible. Every time you have a disaster, do not beat yourself up. Just ask yourself how you could have avoided the trap or planned it better. In this way you can learn a few life lessons from failure. 每个人都有搞砸的时候,人生不可能始终完美无缺。每次遭遇灾难你不要责怪自己,自己想办法如何避免落入陷阱或做个比较好的计划。这样你可以从失败中学习一些人生的经验教训。
9. Nobody else will praise you 没有人会表扬你 Time to give yourself a pat on the back for all your achievements. Don’t be afraid to list them in your head when you get discouraged. Give yourself a score for each finished task. This keeps you strong when facing life's harsh realities. 对于你自己取得的成就,要自己表扬一下自己。气馁时不要害怕不要心慌,每完成一个任务要给自己打个分数,这会让你坚强地面对残酷的现实生活。
10. Toxic company is bad for you 消极的朋友对你没好处 You know the people I mean. These are the whiners, the pessimists, the miserable ones, the cheap ones, the nasty types, and the prejudiced. They make a lousy team. Try to gravitate towards the optimistic and passionate people who will help you see the brighter side of life. 你知道我所指的这类人:牢骚满腹者、悲观主义者、悲惨可怜者、小气不大度的人、脾气不好的人、有偏见的人,这类人会让整个团队都变得糟糕不堪。尽量和乐观充满激情的人相处,有助于你看到生活光明的一面。
11. Money is tight 资金很紧张 Nobody wants to be stalked by debt or creditors. You have to work out how best to stay within your budget. Think of ways to save, like having packed lunches. Never go shopping without a list. Avoid impulsive buys. Use cash as much as you can. Leave the credit cards at home as they tend to lull you into a fantasy world. 没人愿意债务缠身或成为欠债的人,生活开支费用最好不要超出预算。想办法节省一下预算,像午饭吃便当;去购物时拉一个清单,避免冲动购物;尽量用现金消费,把信用卡放在家里,因为信用卡消费起来没有概念。
12. Invest in kindness 善心投资 Doing acts of kindness every day to people at work or those in difficulty will pay handsome dividends. People will return the kindness. Investing in kindness is like having savings in the bank. They will always earn a little interest. What goes around comes around. There is also an added bonus in that it makes you feel good for a while. 每天为同事或者有困难的人慷慨解囊做些善事,人们会回报你的善举。投资善事就像在银行里存钱,总会赚取些许利润回报,善有善报。另外还有一个好处,做善事会让你很长一段时间都感觉良好。
13. Be accountable for your behavior 你要对自己的行为负责 If you behave badly, rudely or take unnecessary risks, then you have to be totally accountable for what you have done. You have to take the responsibility for your behavior. Another harsh lesson from the life arena! Taking the consequences, not blaming others and apologizing for harm done have to be on your to do list. 如果你的表现不好、粗鲁或冒险,那么你就得对你的所作所为完全负责。你要为你的行为负责。从人生大舞台上学到另外一个严酷的现实教训!承担后果不是责备他人,自己要对伤害性的所作所为道歉。
14. Look forward 要向前看 There is no escape. Life is wonderful but it is really hard work. Now is the time to start afresh. 不要逃避现实。生活很美好但也很艰难,从现在开始重新生活。 All the world is full of suffering. It is also full of overcoming. – Helen Keller 尽管世界充满了磨难,但战胜磨难的例子也比比皆是。——海伦-凯勒